> A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was
> nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an
> Envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad.'
>
> With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and
> read the letter.
>
>
> Dear Dad:
>
> It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with
> my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.
>
> I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.
>
> But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing,
> tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I
> am. But it's not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant.
>
> Stacy said that we will be very happy
>
> She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole
> winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
>
> Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt
> anyone.
> We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that
> live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.
>
> In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so
> Stacy can get better. She deserves it.
>
> Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.
>
> Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can
> get to know your grandchildren.
>
>
> Love, Your Son John
>
>
>
> PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.
>
>
> I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a
> Report card. That's in my center desk drawer.
>
>
> I love you.
>
>
> Call me when it's safe to come home.
Why Parents Drink
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